I used to be a hypochondriac, now I am like that with the kids. Anything wrong with me, I think to myself: " I'll just power through it. No big deal." and I even almost forget that I am sick or there might actually be something wrong with me.
When the kids are sick I start thinking they might have cancer or some deadly disease. I get really worried and stare at them thinking I can figure out what the disease is by the way they are breathing.
I am fully aware these thoughts are a little nuts. Lately instead of indulging on them and making myself cry. I am reminding myself that I am in charge of my own thoughts. I have actually been able to, almost stop those thoughts before they manifest into me having a panic attack over the kids having a runny nose for christs sake; what I was literally doing. Now I am taking (what I think is the healthier approach) pushing the thoughts out of my head. Paying attention to the kiddos (as I always did, but not in a freak out manner) and if something seems off, just go to the dr.
Seems so simple but goddamn as a hypochondriac, by the time we made it to the dr I was sure it was cancer or something dire. Now I'm actually able to walk into the Dr.'s office with my whole head on straight and not a crazy person.
Friday, December 29, 2017
Wednesday, December 27, 2017
Crazy Sick Month
It has been a crazy month and a half. I am so happy to say that Christmas happened and it went, well it went. So glad it is now over.
We have been sick with one sickness right on top of the other since mid-November. With three littles I have had no time for anything. I've been lucky I have been able to get to work most days. I think I have maybe slept a total of 3 uninterrupted hours throughout the month. I feel like I just had a baby with my lack of sleep.
As soon as one child wakes up, the other two mess with me. I swear they know right when I am about to fall back asleep and they jump up and need something.
I think I might be dreaming and will wake up and laugh at the craziness of it. Can you imagine dreaming that I had my very own place with three amazing children and we all get sicker than shit for over a month with different illnesses. All hell breaks loose.....damn what a dream. ..... oh wait it's reality....lololololololololololol...insane laughter.
I'm pretty sure the neighbors have to hate our guts at this point. When kids are sick it's not fuckin pretty. It is not happy and it is very loud at unreasonable times. My apartment has paper thin walls, you can pretty much here an entire conversation from next door and they at least talk in normal voices, unlike us over here. I can only imagine the horrific sounds coming from my house during this time of sickness.
My daughter: screeching every time she bumps herself on the wall. My son crying anytime someone looks at him. There has been plenty of fighting among the children, arguments, tantrums unnecessary yelling, they keep flicking the door stopper to listen to it boing (I tell them to stop, but you know how kids are): that has to be annoying as shit to hear the wall constantly making the echoey boing sound and so many loud voices, screams, screeches, and any obnoxious sound imaginable. The more I think about it the more I realize we probably sound like some weird and loud as fuck creatures. Dang, I can't wait for this sickness to go away! Maybe we will sound like a normal family again and be a normal family that makes normal human not creature sounds.
Nope that is dreaming way too big. We are doomed to always sound like creatures
We have been sick with one sickness right on top of the other since mid-November. With three littles I have had no time for anything. I've been lucky I have been able to get to work most days. I think I have maybe slept a total of 3 uninterrupted hours throughout the month. I feel like I just had a baby with my lack of sleep.
As soon as one child wakes up, the other two mess with me. I swear they know right when I am about to fall back asleep and they jump up and need something.
I think I might be dreaming and will wake up and laugh at the craziness of it. Can you imagine dreaming that I had my very own place with three amazing children and we all get sicker than shit for over a month with different illnesses. All hell breaks loose.....damn what a dream. ..... oh wait it's reality....lololololololololololol...insane laughter.
I'm pretty sure the neighbors have to hate our guts at this point. When kids are sick it's not fuckin pretty. It is not happy and it is very loud at unreasonable times. My apartment has paper thin walls, you can pretty much here an entire conversation from next door and they at least talk in normal voices, unlike us over here. I can only imagine the horrific sounds coming from my house during this time of sickness.
My daughter: screeching every time she bumps herself on the wall. My son crying anytime someone looks at him. There has been plenty of fighting among the children, arguments, tantrums unnecessary yelling, they keep flicking the door stopper to listen to it boing (I tell them to stop, but you know how kids are): that has to be annoying as shit to hear the wall constantly making the echoey boing sound and so many loud voices, screams, screeches, and any obnoxious sound imaginable. The more I think about it the more I realize we probably sound like some weird and loud as fuck creatures. Dang, I can't wait for this sickness to go away! Maybe we will sound like a normal family again and be a normal family that makes normal human not creature sounds.
Nope that is dreaming way too big. We are doomed to always sound like creatures
Saturday, December 9, 2017
Tears are Strength
Tears force you to recognize your emotion
Face the issue at hand
They do not let you ignore the root of the problem
Your mind must work through it
That is strength
Face the issue at hand
They do not let you ignore the root of the problem
Your mind must work through it
That is strength
Friday, December 8, 2017
Guilty Freedom
When the kids go to their Dad's for a few days I get super excited, but like that guilty excited. It feels wrong to be separated from them for short periods of time but then again I feel like a REAL mother-fucking person!
The first thing I do is clean my house and hide all the toys in the kid's rooms. It's insanely great and warm feeling to have a nice clean house to relax in, maybe even giddy.
Cleaning when the kids are home is utterly pointless. As soon as any room looks half-way decent they drag some toys in or tear it up one way or another, they will throw cushions on the floor, spill and drop every piece of food and/or drink that comes close to them, overflow the sink, play with the rugs, splash paint water on the walls, finger paint with poo......haha j/k! Might as well though!
I also lie to people and tell them I am super busy all weekend. This way I can do whatever the hell I want! Like work on my blog, paint, eat a lot of junk, sleep for hours and hours, watch Netflix and youtube videos uninterrupted, take a shower while listening to music, omg the anticipation! Terrible right?!?!
Home alone baby, I feel like a Queen!
The first thing I do is clean my house and hide all the toys in the kid's rooms. It's insanely great and warm feeling to have a nice clean house to relax in, maybe even giddy.
Cleaning when the kids are home is utterly pointless. As soon as any room looks half-way decent they drag some toys in or tear it up one way or another, they will throw cushions on the floor, spill and drop every piece of food and/or drink that comes close to them, overflow the sink, play with the rugs, splash paint water on the walls, finger paint with poo......haha j/k! Might as well though!
I also lie to people and tell them I am super busy all weekend. This way I can do whatever the hell I want! Like work on my blog, paint, eat a lot of junk, sleep for hours and hours, watch Netflix and youtube videos uninterrupted, take a shower while listening to music, omg the anticipation! Terrible right?!?!
Home alone baby, I feel like a Queen!
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